‘Tis the season for holiday entertaining!

When you are invited and attend a holiday party, it is customary and good manners to show your appreciation with a gift for the host or hostess.

If you are one of the many people who are confused or anxious about finding the perfect hostess gift for each event, relax.  The gift need not be extravagant or the best gift ever given or received; it is a gesture of appreciation for the effort your host put into the event and a thank you for being invited.

Tips to help you handle hostess gifts with grace and confidence:

• For most holiday events, from open houses to dinner parties, bringing a hostess gift is good form. However, if you are attending a potluck dinner and are bringing food to share at the party, it is not necessary to also bring a hostess gift, although it is never wrong to offer a gift.
• A hostess gift is just that, a gift. Whether you bring wine or other spirits, chocolates or candy, flowers, or anything else, you are giving it to your host to do with as they please. Do not expect your gift to be served or put on display that evening and do not take it back at the end of the event.The exception is a food dish brought to a potluck dinner party, in which case, you usually retrieve the dish your brought it in and any remaining food when you leave.
• Present your gift to the host or hostess when you arrive for the event, but do not expect them to make a fuss, especially when you are attending a larger event with many guests. Your hosts will be busy and, aside from a “thank you” when they receive the gift, will not have time to dote on it.
• Keep it simple. Hostess gifts do not need to be extravagant or unique. Generally, expect to spend between $20 and $30 for a hostess gift. A bottle of wine is often a good choice, as are chocolates, homemade treats, wine glass charms, scented candles, flowers, and so on.
• When choosing a hostess gift, look for something that will cause minimal fuss, for example, avoid cut flowers that need to be arranged into a vase immediately. Instead, choose a flower arrangement already in a vase, a potted plant, or another item that doesn’t require your host’s immediate attention.
• Generally, you bring a hostess gift with you and offer it when you arrive. If you forget, don’t have time before the event, or want to find out what they need before choosing a gift, it is also acceptable to send a hostess gift the following day. For example, you could send a flower bouquet with a thank you card the day after the party.
• The hostess gift is a thank you to the host and hostess. Do not expect a thank you card or gift in return. Of course, the hosts should acknowledge the gift with a “thank you” when they receive it. If they were busy and you left the gift and card for them to receive later, a phone call the following day with a personal “thank you” for the gift is polite.

Whatever you decide to bring as a hostess gift, once you are at the party relax and enjoy the time with your friends and family. Rest assured that the hosts did not invite you for the gift you would bring; they invited you for your company.

The best gift any guest can give is their attendance, good humour, and enjoyment of the event.