The Fitness and Etiquette Connection

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on April 11th, 2011

Fitness, Exercise, Yoga and Pilates seem to be on people’s minds these days. The finer weather is approaching and we are all eager to get in shape. I am often asked, “Is there a connection between Fitness and Etiquette?”

There is and, to provide more details, it is my pleasure to introduce the author of this guest post, Yanick MacDougall

Yanick is a motivated, supportive and dynamic Professional Fitness Trainer. She exudes enthusiasm in all her classes. I highly recommend that you check out her website for interesting, up-to-date information about getting into shape and her services.

With kind regards,

Elizabeth

We’ve all seen those posters on the gym wall stating ‘Put Weights Away’, or ‘Wipe Equipment after Use’ and more disturbingly, ‘No Spitting in the Water Fountain’.  All these rules apply to gym etiquette, but did you know that Etiquette and Fitness combine in a much bigger way than that?

When I ask myself ‘what is etiquette?’ my automatic answer is ‘respect yourself and those around you.’ During fitness, we are given ample opportunity to exercise both forms of respect.  How so?  Engaging in physical activity is a way to treat your body with the respect it deserves. When you take the time to exercise you feel more energized, you perceive yourself as healthier and stronger and this contentment with yourself transfers into happiness towards others.

Here are 5 ways to respect your self by embracing fitness;

  1. Take the time for yourself to do something you enjoy! You wouldn’t begrudge a friend or family member 60 min of time spent on themselves, so treat yourself to the same respect you give others.
  2. Have faith in yourself and your strength. Do you tell your kids that they can achieve anything they set their minds to?  Do you believe it, when you say it?  Then remember that even if a work-out is hard, especially if it’s hard, you can do it!
  3. Take the time to do it right. Do you only have 45 mins between dropping of your daughter at gymnastics and getting home in time to make dinner for your husband/wife and kids?  Resist the temptation to skimp on your warm-up and skip your stretch.  Your muscles won’t work as efficiently if they are cold, and you will ache for days if you skip your stretch.
  4. Do not use the time spent in front of the mirror checking out what you consider to be your flaws. Instead, congratulate yourself for taking the steps towards a more balanced, healthy lifestyle.
  5. Share your enthusiasm for fitness with others. Yes, there is a tactful way to encourage friends to join you as you get into shape.  Explain how much you enjoy your program or class, or how having a friend accompany you, will help motivate you. Remind your family or friends how exercising together is a great way to spend time together with out partaking in the usual dinner, drinks or sedentary movie nights.

As a Personal Trainer, and the owner of SHAPE Fitness and Training, I see people falling into the pitfalls of not giving themselves time to work at becoming a stronger person or judging themselves more severely than they would ever judge another.

We need to shake off those negative feelings, embrace a healthier and active lifestyle, and remember that proper etiquette begins with respecting yourself, so that you can respect others!

Yanick MacDougall, Surrey, BC Canada

SHAPE Fitness and Training, mobile personal/ group training. Pre/postnatal fitness specialist. Mom to 2 girls ages 3 and 1, and wife to hubby, Lyle.

Bicycle Safety Considerations

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on February 28th, 2011

With the nicer weather, more and more people are getting out their bicycles to spend time outdoors. I’m blessed to live in the Greater Vancouver area where cities and municipalities have set up multiple bicycle paths, as well as skate and bike parks. However, I was recently reminded of the importance of teaching children about using their bicycles safely in the community.

I was walking through a parking lot at a local office complex when I was nearly run down by a couple of children on their bicycles. The children, in their tweens, were using the parking lot and wheelchair ramp into the office building as a track to race their bicycles. The experience brought to mind the many dangers this practice poses for both the riders and other pedestrians who may be using the area: an elderly person may not have been able to move out of the way as quickly as I was able to when the bikes came racing out onto the sidewalk, a driver may have opened a car door into the bikers’ paths as they sped by either knocking them off their bikes or causing them to swerve dangerously, a car may have been backing up and the young riders might not have had time to get out of the way, and so on.

Before allowing your children to ride their bicycles, be sure they understand the rules of the road and adhere to them. Remind them of the following bicycle safety rules:

  • The rules of the road apply to car parks the same as any other road
  • Riding on sidewalks is generally prohibited for anyone over 8 years of age
  • Always be aware of your surroundings including pedestrians, drivers, and other cyclists and be prepared to avoid hazards that may appear suddenly
  • Ride in control
  • Be respectful and use areas as they are intended

Bicycling is a wonderful activity for youth and should be encouraged. If your neighbourhood does not currently have a skate and bike park where youth can ride their bikes and practice tricks on ramps and bars in a safe area, advocate to have one installed.

Kind regards,
Elizabeth

Common Courtesy

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on February 20th, 2011

Each month I write about the importance of showing common courtesy towards others in our everyday lives. For the most part, I do believe we all strive to “do our best.”

However, there are times when mitigating circumstances arise that are beyond our control, and we just cannot manage to do all the right things at the right time. This past Christmas, I found myself in just such a situation.

In early December, my Mother phoned me from her home in England. My 88-year-old Father had been admitted to hospital. In that moment, my priorities changed. In a flurry of mixed emotions, bag packing, and phone calls, I quickly rescheduled critical activities and arranged my life so I could catch the next plane out of Vancouver. The well-intended festive notes, Christmas cards and presents remained―still waiting for a hand-written personal note and gift wrap.

I spent the remainder of the month in England reminiscing with family and supporting my parents in any way I could. The season passed and I never did get back to those cards and gifts.  I truly hope that no one has taken offense or been insulted by my transgression, but, as I reflect upon my actions at that time, I know that I would not have done anything differently given the opportunity.

“…there are times when mitigating circumstances arise that are beyond our control, and we just cannot manage to do all the right things at the right time.”

The foundation of good manners starts in the home and radiates to our family, friends, and colleagues along life’s way. As we show consideration, love, and respect for others, we role play good examples to our children and younger members of the family in hope that they too will emulate our actions as they travel life’s journey. Cards and gifts with handwritten notes are one way that we show respect and caring for other people in our lives, but they pale in comparison to being there when someone needs you―and my father and family needed me.

Good manners also allow us to be humble and to accept the compassion and understanding of others in our times of need. I thank you all for your understanding and compassion in my time of need and hope that you also  be blessed with kindness and understanding when you “just cannot manage to do all the right things at the right time.”

Kind regards,
Elizabeth

Snow Etiquette Fundamentals

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on January 21st, 2011

Consideration and Kindness

Living in the Greater Vancouver area, I don’t have many opportunities to experience snow. When it comes, there is often a feeling of excitement, especially among children, and it often melts before it becomes too tiresome. However, the lack of experience with snow in this part of the world also often means an ignorance of the etiquette rules that go along with it, which can be frustrating and even dangerous for others.

These snow etiquette tips apply whether you live in an area where snow is relatively rare or where it arrives in October and stays until March.

  • Clear your walkway as soon as possible and within 8 hours of snow falling. If you live on a street with a public sidewalk in front of your house, clear the snow from the sidewalk too. Some cities have by-laws that require homeowners to clear their walkways and the public sidewalks in front of their homes. If your city doesn’t, clear the snow anyway.
  • If you use a snowblower, do not blow the snow onto your neighbour’s sidewalk, onto or around cars parked in driveways or on the road, or onto the roadway where it could cause a hazard for drivers. Don’t shovel it onto those areas either.

If you see someone in need of help, offer your assistance and teach your children to do the same.

  • Snowy weather can be a major hazard for elderly people who have difficulty walking through the snow or shovelling their walkways. If you have an elderly neighbour, shovel their walkway as well as your own; if you see someone struggling to walk through the snow or on an icy surface, offer your arm in assistance; if someone in a wheelchair is blocked by snow, offer to help push them through. Also check in with elderly neighbours who might not be able to get out in the snow: they may need a ride to a doctor’s appointment or to the grocery store.
  • If you have a dog, remember to pick up after them even in the snow. Although, it may be quickly hidden in the snow, at some point, the snow will melt and these “landmines” will be left all over the sidewalks and grassy areas.

Hostess Gifts with Grace and Confidence

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on December 13th, 2010

‘Tis the season for holiday entertaining!

When you are invited and attend a holiday party, it is customary and good manners to show your appreciation with a gift for the host or hostess.

If you are one of the many people who are confused or anxious about finding the perfect hostess gift for each event, relax.  The gift need not be extravagant or the best gift ever given or received; it is a gesture of appreciation for the effort your host put into the event and a thank you for being invited.

Tips to help you handle hostess gifts with grace and confidence:

  • For most holiday events, from open houses to dinner parties, bringing a hostess gift is good form. However, if you are attending a potluck dinner and are bringing food to share at the party, it is not necessary to also bring a hostess gift, although it is never wrong to offer a gift.

  • A hostess gift is just that, a gift. Whether you bring wine or other spirits, chocolates or candy, flowers, or anything else, you are giving it to your host to do with as they please. Do not expect your gift to be served or put on display that evening and do not take it back at the end of the event.The exception is a food dish brought to a potluck dinner party, in which case, you usually retrieve the dish your brought it in and any remaining food when you leave.

  • Present your gift to the host or hostess when you arrive for the event, but do not expect them to make a fuss, especially when you are attending a larger event with many guests. Your hosts will be busy and, aside from a “thank you” when they receive the gift, will not have time to dote on it.

  • Keep it simple. Hostess gifts do not need to be extravagant or unique. Generally, expect to spend between $20 and $30 for a hostess gift. A bottle of wine is often a good choice, as are chocolates, homemade treats, wine glass charms, scented candles, flowers, and so on.

  • When choosing a hostess gift, look for something that will cause minimal fuss, for example, avoid cut flowers that need to be arranged into a vase immediately. Instead, choose a flower arrangement already in a vase, a potted plant, or another item that doesn’t require your host’s immediate attention.

  • Generally, you bring a hostess gift with you and offer it when you arrive. If you forget, don’t have time before the event, or want to find out what they need before choosing a gift, it is also acceptable to send a hostess gift the following day. For example, you could send a flower bouquet with a thank you card the day after the party.

  • The hostess gift is a thank you to the host and hostess. Do not expect a thank you card or gift in return. Of course, the hosts should acknowledge the gift with a “thank you” when they receive it. If they were busy and you left the gift and card for them to receive later, a phone call the following day with a personal “thank you” for the gift is polite.

Whatever you decide to bring as a hostess gift, once you are at the party relax and enjoy the time with your friends and family. Rest assured that the hosts did not invite you for the gift you would bring; they invited you for your company.

The best gift any guest can give is their attendance, good humour, and enjoyment of the event.

Etiquette Around People Who Have Disabilities

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on October 14th, 2010

Although we often take our bodies for granted, they are not indestructible nor do they last forever. Those of us who consider ourselves “able-bodied” will find that this condition is only temporary and, at some point, whether through normal wear and tear or through injury or illness, we too will face the frustration of not being able to do the things we used to be able to do and, perhaps, the need to rely on others for assistance.

It should go without saying that we treat all people who have disabilities as we would like to be treated in a similar situation. However, if you have not yet been in a similar situation, you may feel awkward and unsure about how you would want to be treated.

The following general guidelines for interacting with or assisting people who have disabilities may help:

  • Be respectful of the person’s capabilities

Most people who have disabilities have learned how to cope in most situations they encounter. Don’t assume they need help or are incapable, but if someone seems to be having difficulty, ask them if you can be of assistance.

  • Ask before entering a person’s personal space

Remember that assistive devices, such as wheelchairs, canes, and service dogs, are part of the person. If someone seems to be struggling up a hill or curb in a wheelchair, ask if they would like assistance before you take hold of their wheelchair. If a person with a visual impairment is attempting to navigate a busy area, introduce yourself and ask if you can help, and then allow them to take your arm rather than taking hold of them.  Always, let the person tell you the best way you can help them.

  • Communicate with the person directly

Avoid talking with a person’s attendant as though the person wasn’t present.  If you are speaking with a person who has a hearing impairment, face them as you talk. Avoid talking fast or using exaggeratedly slow speech and do not cover your face or mouth.  People with hearing impairments often use facial expression and mouth movement to help them understand what is being said.

  • When possible, talk to people at their eye level.

If you are talking to someone who is in a wheelchair, you might squat beside them or sit in a chair so they don’t have to look up at you. If you are standing, don’t stand so close that they have to tip their head all the way back to make eye contact with you.

Although there are other disability-specific suggestions, the most important thing to remember when interacting with people who have disabilities is to treat them with the same respect and consideration you would anyone else. Most people are forgiving when intentions are good so don’t avoid interacting with people who have disabilities for fear you will make a mistake. For additional information about disability etiquette, see here: United Spinal Organization Guidebook.

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Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on September 30th, 2010

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Dog Walking Etiquette

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on September 15th, 2010

Living in the Lower Mainland of British Columbia where one in ten people own a dog, we are fortunate to share our community with many of our four legged. For the most part, dog owners are considerate of others when they are out with their dogs, but on occasion we are reminded that not everyone is aware of or follows good etiquette when walking their dog.

If you own or care for dogs, be sure to follow these etiquette guidelines when taking your dog to public places:

Respect on leash areas of parks and streets
In BC, we are fortunate to have many off leash dog parks and areas. These areas are specifically set aside to allow dogs to run and interact with other dogs unhindered by a leash. When you are not in an off-leash area, keep your dog on a leash. Many people are uncomfortable around dogs or even allergic to them. Some simply don’t want dogs putting muddy paws on their clothes or are concerned that they will be bitten. Even if you think your dog is well trained and friendly, keep him on a leash unless the area specifically allows dogs off leash and especially when someone looks nervous about the dog, if they have a leashed dog, or if they have small children with them.

When Using a Leash, Keep your dog on the same side of the walkway as you are
If your dog is on a leash, particularly a retractable leash, make sure your dog does not cross to the other side of the sidewalk or path from where you are walking. Runners or bikers on that path may come along quickly and not see the leash stretching across their path. If they trip over the leash, they and your dog could be seriously injured.

Give way to bikers, runners, and horses that share the path
If you are walking in an area where people ride bikes, run, or ride horses, do not allow your dog to chase or get in the way of these people. If your dog is off leash, call them back and hold onto them until the area is clear. If you dog is on a leash, bring them in close to you and make sure the leash doesn’t cross the path. Depending on their speed and distance from the ground, bikers, runners, and riders may not be able to see and navigate around your dog in time.

Always clean up after your dog
Whether you are in a residential area or off on a trail, do not leave dog excrement laying about. It is extremely inconsiderate to leave it on a sidewalk or grassy area where children play, but even on a trail where you might rationalize that it would decompose on its own, it is inappropriate to leave it. With the large numbers of dogs sharing the trails and parks, the amount of dog excrement that would be left would not decompose in a timely manner and the trail would be less enjoyable for others.

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Looking for a unique gift idea?

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on August 11th, 2010

This question was posed to me some time ago and, again, by someone quite recently,

“Next week I will be meeting my, soon to be, Step-Mother for the very first time.  I would like to buy her a gift but have no idea what to buy. Do you have any suggestions?”

A beautiful bouquet of flowers is always a welcome gift, by all, except for those who have allergies. An alternative, and more personal option, is a Silver or Crystal Picture Frame. Rather a nice selection can be found in a good Jeweller’s Shop.  They will also professionally gift wrap it for you, which is a nice added touch.

A suggestion for the gift card, “To dear (NAME)  “Welcome to our Family” With warmest best wishes, (SIGN YOUR NAME).

Most important, take your Camera with you for this important occasion. If you don’t have one, buy a cheap disposable Camera. Whether you are meeting at a Restaurant or a Coffee Shop there is always someone close by who will be willing to take a family photograph. Explain to your, soon to be, Step-Mother (after she has opened the gift) that the photograph will follow; completing, in my opinion, the perfect gift. Along with something one cannot buy, the warm & welcoming smile and nice compliments.

The family circle will be joined well before the next big occasion – The Wedding Day!

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