Get Ready for School with a Bus Etiquette Review

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on August 29th, 2011

If your children take a school bus or public transit to school, make bus etiquette part of your back to school preparations. After relaxing throughout the summer, your children have probably fallen out of their school routines including their bus etiquette. Start by waking them a little earlier each day to practice for those early mornings and to ensure they will be on time for the bus. Here are a few more bus etiquette tips to review with your children: Read more »

Is a Gift Required for the Bride and Groom when attending an Engagement Party put on by the Bride’s Mother?

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on June 13th, 2011

The decision of whether one wants to give a gift, or not, is always at the discretion of the guest. However, that being said, it is customary to take a small gift, for the Bride and Groom, to the Engagement Party.

Taking into consideration the couple’s taste in decor eg: Traditional, Contemporary etc. you may consider one of the following gifts appropriate and easy on the budget:

  • A nice Picture Frame – Made from Crystal, wood, metal. There are some really unique ones on the market today.
  • A Vase – for all those flowers the groom will be buying! Consider a Bud Vase or one suitable for a small bunch of flowers.
  • A Photograph Album – Yes, people still use them for their favourite photo’s, on the Coffee Table.
  • If you have a photograph of the happy couple in their younger years or when they first met, put a copy on the first page as a memento.

A gift we were given on our Engagement – A small crystal dish in the shape of a half- moon (crescent shape). It can be used to serve after dinner chocolates or to hold soap or jewelry in the bathroom. It has remained one of my favourite gifts, given to us by a work colleague of mine. Small but, special.

If you are really unsure of what to buy, you can always consider a pre-paid Visa/Mastercard which can be purchased from several local shops. Ultimately, remember, it is always the thought that counts the most.

Elizabeth

Bike Month and Road Bike Etiquette

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on June 6th, 2011

In British Columbia, June is Bike Month. During this month, many organizations and government agencies host or sponsor bicycling events intended to encourage people to bike more and drive less. (You can get more information and see a list of upcoming events at the Better Environmentally Sound Transportation (BEST) Bike Month website).

Increasing the number of bikes on the roads (and reducing the number of cars) has many benefits — for the environment, for individuals, and for our communities — but it’s not without its own challenges.

One of the challenges is sharing the roadways and the somewhat tenuous relationship between motorists and bicyclists. The differences in the speed of travel and the ability of bicycles to slip silently between cars has led to much frustration on the part of vehicle drivers, while inattentive drivers and the potential for harm generates fear and anger among bicyclists. However, much of this conflict could be solved through basic etiquette – on both sides.

Bicycle Etiquette for Drivers

  • Be aware of your surroundings and watch for smaller vehicles, such as bicycles and motorcycles, especially in and around intersections.
  • Use caution when passing cyclists in the same lane. Slow down and move a far as possible to the left to give the cyclist as much room as possible. If there is a left lane, consider changing lanes before passing.
  • When parallel parking along a roadway, park as close to the curb as possible to leave room for cyclists riding to the left of parked cars.
  • When parked along a roadway, check for cyclists before opening your car door.
  • When making a right turn, stop before entering the intersection and check for cyclists both coming from behind on the right side of your vehicle and coming from the left across the intersection.
  • Avoid using roadways designated as Bike Routes as thoroughfares. Treat them as local access routes and, remember that in BC, these routes have a speed limit of 30 km/hour.
  • Do not honk your horn at a cyclist. The sudden, loud noise may distract them so they lose control of their bike.

Riding Etiquette for Cyclists

  • Know the rules of the road and follow them.
  • Be aware of your surroundings. Don’t distract yourself by listening to an ipod or radio while riding.
  • Ride as far to the right as possible, but give yourself enough room to ride safely and stay out of the way of car doors being opened in front of you.
  • When riding with other cyclists, ride in single file, not side by side.
  • When riding on a Bike Route, remember that you must still share the road with other vehicles and the same riding etiquette applies.
  • Signal your intentions and be predictable.
  • If you become aware of a car wanting to pass, move as far as possible to the right to give them as much room as possible.

Roadways are intended to accommodate many vehicle types as well as pedestrians.

No matter how you are travelling, a little courtesy and respect goes a long way towards improving the safety and enjoyment of travelling on roadways for everyone.

Top 10 Tips for Planning the Perfect Wedding!

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on May 16th, 2011

Just the thought of planning a Wedding can be overwhelming and stressful for most people. Not sure where to start? Start with these Top 10 Tips as a foundation for your “To Do” List:

  1. Permission to Marry – Start off on the right footing and future in-laws, on both sides, will be happy. It is customary for the future groom to visit the future bride’s father and ask permission to marry his daughter. If it is not possible to ask the father, he should ask her mother or next of kin.
  2. Where the marriage will take place – Once it has been agreed the marriage will take place, the couple should decide on where they wish to be married. A Church, a Temple or a Registry Office. If they choose a Church it is normally one close to the bride’s home.
  3. Book Early – This cannot be emphasised enough. The Vicar or Priest should be contacted immediately to discuss the reading of the banns and book a date. This is often done as early as a year in advance, in order to get the date you want.
  4. Cost, who pays? – Traditionally the bride’s parents pay. However, owing to the exorbitant cost in today’s society sometimes one has to compromise. It is often suggested that the groom or his family pay for the drinks at the Reception. A Cash Bar is also commonly used, and most acceptable, with drinks for the various toasts and wine with dinner being provided by those paying.
  5. Dress for the Wedding – Traditionally the bride, or the father of the bride, buys the bride’s dress. Sometimes the dress is handed down through the generations, from mother to daughter. Today, it is also common for the bride to hire her wedding gown.
    The majority of men hire a suit or Tuxedo for the occasion.
    Often the bride will pay for the bridesmaid’s dresses. However, owing to the cost, it is also acceptable for the bridesmaid’s to buy their own.
  6. Essential bookings – At the earliest possible date, book the transportation for the bride and family to the Church and to the Reception. Also transportation for after the reception is of utmost importance to ensure there is no drinking and driving.
  7. The Photographer – To avoid disappointment book the Photographer as soon as possible. A year in advance is advisable.
  8. The Reception & the catering – Book 6 months to one year in advance.  Owing to mishaps that can occur eg: double bookings make sure you visit the place of choice closer to the date and check the catering for food quality.
  9. The Entertainment – While the Entertainment should be booked well ahead of time, take into consideration the range of the age group taking part in the festivities, before you make your choice. The party will most likely consist of the young and the elderly – all looking forward to taking part on this happy occasion.
  10. The Gift Opening – Traditionally the gift opening is done the day after the wedding day, usually at the bride’s home or other place of choice.

Don’t procrastinate, set the date!

Grace in Hockey and Other Sports

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on May 2nd, 2011

The Vancouver Canucks have just won a challenging round against the Chicago Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup playoffs and the city has been abuzz with the excitement of the games. Everywhere you look someone is wearing a Canucks jersey, complete strangers are discussing the games, and Canucks flags are flying on top of buildings and from many car windows. I even saw a model of Roberto Luongo, the Canucks goalie, in full goalie regalia mounted in front of a net on top of a car driving around the city.

I love hockey and it’s fun to see the team spirit around the city. Sports, whether you are playing or watching, have much to teach about life and manners –working together as a team, hard work and perseverance, giving your best no matter how dire the circumstance, winning – and losing – with grace, and most of all, good sportsmanship.

It’s great to show your team spirit: cheer on your team, wear the jersey, and get excited when they’re doing well, but it is also important to keep things in perspective and not lose our heads when we lose a game. In life, not everyone will always be on your team and you won’t always be on the winning team, and that’s okay. What’s not okay is to denigrate people on the opposing team or to be physically or verbally aggressive. Even if your team doesn’t win, rejoice in the good fortune of those who do and appreciate the skill of others – even the players on the other team.  Losing is disappointing, but don’t let your own disappointment overwhelm the situation and ruin the fun for everyone.

Go Canucks Go!

Lent and Respecting Others’ Personal Choice

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on April 18th, 2011

Recently, I was having lunch in a restaurant and overheard someone explaining how they had given up dessert for Lent. I was reminded of how fortunate we are to live in a multicultural society where people have differing beliefs and customs.

For those not familiar with Lent, it is a period of penitence observed by Christians before Easter. In general, Lent starts on Ash Wednesday and ends on Easter Sunday, and it is customary for many Christians to give up a favourite food or activity during this time. Lent is largely a personal choice based on faith and may be observed in different ways depending on the person’s church or denomination.

It is the differences between people that make life interesting.

Whether you agree with their decision or not, it is always good manners to be respectful of others’ beliefs and customs. If someone is fasting or has decided to refrain from a food or activity, it is polite to be respectful of their choice. Do not attempt to convince them to change their mind or tease them into “having just a little”. Children may also need reminders to respect others’ beliefs and traditions and not tease anyone whose beliefs differ from their own.

It is the differences between people that make life interesting. Being open and accepting of others is not only good manners, it is an opportunity to learn more about the other people in our lives and to create a real community.

Kind regards,
Elizabeth

The Fitness and Etiquette Connection

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on April 11th, 2011

Fitness, Exercise, Yoga and Pilates seem to be on people’s minds these days. The finer weather is approaching and we are all eager to get in shape. I am often asked, “Is there a connection between Fitness and Etiquette?”

There is and, to provide more details, it is my pleasure to introduce the author of this guest post, Yanick MacDougall

Yanick is a motivated, supportive and dynamic Professional Fitness Trainer. She exudes enthusiasm in all her classes. I highly recommend that you check out her website for interesting, up-to-date information about getting into shape and her services.

With kind regards,

Elizabeth

We’ve all seen those posters on the gym wall stating ‘Put Weights Away’, or ‘Wipe Equipment after Use’ and more disturbingly, ‘No Spitting in the Water Fountain’.  All these rules apply to gym etiquette, but did you know that Etiquette and Fitness combine in a much bigger way than that?

When I ask myself ‘what is etiquette?’ my automatic answer is ‘respect yourself and those around you.’ During fitness, we are given ample opportunity to exercise both forms of respect.  How so?  Engaging in physical activity is a way to treat your body with the respect it deserves. When you take the time to exercise you feel more energized, you perceive yourself as healthier and stronger and this contentment with yourself transfers into happiness towards others.

Here are 5 ways to respect your self by embracing fitness;

  1. Take the time for yourself to do something you enjoy! You wouldn’t begrudge a friend or family member 60 min of time spent on themselves, so treat yourself to the same respect you give others.
  2. Have faith in yourself and your strength. Do you tell your kids that they can achieve anything they set their minds to?  Do you believe it, when you say it?  Then remember that even if a work-out is hard, especially if it’s hard, you can do it!
  3. Take the time to do it right. Do you only have 45 mins between dropping of your daughter at gymnastics and getting home in time to make dinner for your husband/wife and kids?  Resist the temptation to skimp on your warm-up and skip your stretch.  Your muscles won’t work as efficiently if they are cold, and you will ache for days if you skip your stretch.
  4. Do not use the time spent in front of the mirror checking out what you consider to be your flaws. Instead, congratulate yourself for taking the steps towards a more balanced, healthy lifestyle.
  5. Share your enthusiasm for fitness with others. Yes, there is a tactful way to encourage friends to join you as you get into shape.  Explain how much you enjoy your program or class, or how having a friend accompany you, will help motivate you. Remind your family or friends how exercising together is a great way to spend time together with out partaking in the usual dinner, drinks or sedentary movie nights.

As a Personal Trainer, and the owner of SHAPE Fitness and Training, I see people falling into the pitfalls of not giving themselves time to work at becoming a stronger person or judging themselves more severely than they would ever judge another.

We need to shake off those negative feelings, embrace a healthier and active lifestyle, and remember that proper etiquette begins with respecting yourself, so that you can respect others!

Yanick MacDougall, Surrey, BC Canada

SHAPE Fitness and Training, mobile personal/ group training. Pre/postnatal fitness specialist. Mom to 2 girls ages 3 and 1, and wife to hubby, Lyle.

Bicycle Safety Considerations

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on February 28th, 2011

With the nicer weather, more and more people are getting out their bicycles to spend time outdoors. I’m blessed to live in the Greater Vancouver area where cities and municipalities have set up multiple bicycle paths, as well as skate and bike parks. However, I was recently reminded of the importance of teaching children about using their bicycles safely in the community.

I was walking through a parking lot at a local office complex when I was nearly run down by a couple of children on their bicycles.The children, in their tweens, were using the parking lot and wheelchair ramp into the office building as a track to race their bicycles. The experience brought to mind the many dangers this practice poses for both the riders and other pedestrians who may be using the area: an elderly person may not have been able to move out of the way as quickly as I was able to when the bikes came racing out onto the sidewalk, a driver may have opened a car door into the bikers’ paths as they sped by either knocking them off their bikes or causing them to swerve dangerously, a car may have been backing up and the young riders might not have had time to get out of the way, and so on.

Before allowing your children to ride their bicycles, be sure they understand the rules of the road and adhere to them. Remind them of the following bicycle safety rules:

  • The rules of the road apply to car parks the same as any other road
  • Riding on sidewalks is generally prohibited for anyone over 8 years of age
  • Always be aware of your surroundings including pedestrians, drivers, and other cyclists and be prepared to avoid hazards that may appear suddenly
  • Ride in control
  • Be respectful and use areas as they are intended

Bicycling is a wonderful activity for youth and should be encouraged. If your neighbourhood does not currently have a skate and bike park where youth can ride their bikes and practice tricks on ramps and bars in a safe area, advocate to have one installed.

Kind regards,
Elizabeth

Common Courtesy

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on February 20th, 2011

Each month I write about the importance of showing common courtesy towards others in our everyday lives. For the most part, I do believe we all strive to “do our best.”

However, there are times when mitigating circumstances arise that are beyond our control, and we just cannot manage to do all the right things at the right time. This past Christmas, I found myself in just such a situation.

In early December, my Mother phoned me from her home in England. My 88-year-old Father had been admitted to hospital. In that moment, my priorities changed. In a flurry of mixed emotions, bag packing, and phone calls, I quickly rescheduled critical activities and arranged my life so I could catch the next plane out of Vancouver. The well-intended festive notes, Christmas cards and presents remained―still waiting for a hand-written personal note and gift wrap.

I spent the remainder of the month in England reminiscing with family and supporting my parents in any way I could. The season passed and I never did get back to those cards and gifts.  I truly hope that no one has taken offense or been insulted by my transgression, but, as I reflect upon my actions at that time, I know that I would not have done anything differently given the opportunity.

“…there are times when mitigating circumstances arise that are beyond our control, and we just cannot manage to do all the right things at the right time.”

The foundation of good manners starts in the home and radiates to our family, friends, and colleagues along life’s way. As we show consideration, love, and respect for others, we role play good examples to our children and younger members of the family in hope that they too will emulate our actions as they travel life’s journey. Cards and gifts with handwritten notes are one way that we show respect and caring for other people in our lives, but they pale in comparison to being there when someone needs you―and my father and family needed me.

Good manners also allow us to be humble and to accept the compassion and understanding of others in our times of need. I thank you all for your understanding and compassion in my time of need and hope that you also  be blessed with kindness and understanding when you “just cannot manage to do all the right things at the right time.”

Kind regards,
Elizabeth

Snow Etiquette Fundamentals

Posted by Elizabeth Etiquette on January 21st, 2011

Consideration and Kindness

Living in the Greater Vancouver area, I don’t have many opportunities to experience snow. When it comes, there is often a feeling of excitement, especially among children, and it often melts before it becomes too tiresome. However, the lack of experience with snow in this part of the world also often means an ignorance of the etiquette rules that go along with it, which can be frustrating and even dangerous for others.

These snow etiquette tips apply whether you live in an area where snow is relatively rare or where it arrives in October and stays until March.

  • Clear your walkway as soon as possible and within 8 hours of snow falling. If you live on a street with a public sidewalk in front of your house, clear the snow from the sidewalk too. Some cities have by-laws that require homeowners to clear their walkways and the public sidewalks in front of their homes. If your city doesn’t, clear the snow anyway.
  • If you use a snowblower, do not blow the snow onto your neighbour’s sidewalk, onto or around cars parked in driveways or on the road, or onto the roadway where it could cause a hazard for drivers. Don’t shovel it onto those areas either.

If you see someone in need of help, offer your assistance and teach your children to do the same.

  • Snowy weather can be a major hazard for elderly people who have difficulty walking through the snow or shovelling their walkways. If you have an elderly neighbour, shovel their walkway as well as your own; if you see someone struggling to walk through the snow or on an icy surface, offer your arm in assistance; if someone in a wheelchair is blocked by snow, offer to help push them through. Also check in with elderly neighbours who might not be able to get out in the snow: they may need a ride to a doctor’s appointment or to the grocery store.
  • If you have a dog, remember to pick up after them even in the snow. Although, it may be quickly hidden in the snow, at some point, the snow will melt and these “landmines” will be left all over the sidewalks and grassy areas.
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